... and they call it mid-life crisis.

When I imagined myself at the age that I am now, I had a very clear picture of what I would be like.  I'd be free from the corporate life, having my own successful business that allowed my uniform to be jeans and a polo shirt. I'd be tooling around town in my red Jeep Wrangler, picking my kids up at prep school (I always knew I'd have kids later rather than sooner). I'd have the top of my Jeep down and hop out, wearing my signature cowboy boots, tossing my locs over my shoulder. Yeah.. That's the ticket!


So how does my mental picture stack up, now that I'm at that age? Well ....

Locs - check
Cowboy boots - check
Young kids - check
Red Jeep Wrangler - we-e-e-l-l-l does a scale model count?


As for the rest, why depress myself even further? So, what happened? I chose the safe road. Buried myself in trying to climb the corporate ladder, becoming a wife and mother. Silencing the rebel in me and bringing forth the my sane and sensible person . In a word, I grew BORING!

Psychologists have a phrase for where I am now - mid-life crisis. According to Wikipedia, a mid-life crisis is ". . . a period of dramatic self-doubt that is felt by some individuals in the "middle years" or middle age of life, as a result of sensing the passing of their own youth and the imminence of their old age". Yup .. in that case, I'm a classic example. Perhaps it was the realization that my second child would be entering college at about the time that I'd be slated to retire that triggered it for me. Whatever it is, life is too short to remain in stasis.

So that mental picture may not be quite what I'd imagined but it's not over yet. I have two lovely boys (7 & 4), a husband I consider my soulmate, a fairly decent job on in a field that I love. And one that I'm working with my friends on converting to our own  business. It ain't all bad .. but I intend for it to get better.

I remember Donny Osmond singing back in the day "And they call it Puppy Love...". I need a song for this period of my life. Perhaps Donny can help - after all, he seems to have gone thru that himself (how else do explain that  "White and Nerdy" music video?).

As for me .. I'm coming out swinging. My intention is to use this blog to document my steps towards achieving the vision I had for myself.  Stasis means death. Me - I intend to be Kicking it!